Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Cooking with Rantolotl!

It's time to expose readers to a side of Rantolotl that's not been seen before; cooking!

I decided to start simple, and when visiting the market yesterday I picked up this little beauty;

That's right, it's a nice, fresh MallowBunny! I pity the poor little fucker who gets one of these given to them for easter. Granny's cruelest present yet, but ideal for our purposes today. We're going to use this Rabbit to create a lovely coconut encrusted roulade, and of course, a drink to accompany our dinner - a unique version of the Fluffy Penis, originally created by Nodge; that we'll name the Fluffy Bunny. All in time for Easter!

Step 1) Behead Brer;
As shown below, a swift chopping motion, partway back from the head, about halfway along the ears, at an angle back towards the head, will create the cut we need. See Fig 1 & Fig 2 below for reference.

Fig 1. Remove Rabbit's head

Fig 2. The cut should look something like this

Step 2) Prepare the Fluffy Bunny;
You'll need a blender for this task. Pour a metric cup of Vodka into blender, with a handful of ice. Place rabbit head in blender (Fig 3), and blend until smooth in consistency, and crunching ceases (Fig 4). Pour mixture into a margarita glass, and garnish.

Fig 3. Vodka, Ice & Rabbit placed in blender

Fig 4. Blending the mixture

Step 3) Prepare the Roulade;
While you've been preparing the Fluffy Bunny, the remaining section of the rabbit will be slowly marinating in its own juices. Now, this is a dish best served rare; so this step is a simple one. Place rabbit on chopping board, and slice into 1/2 cm width portions. Arrange as below.

Fig 5. Tasty coconut encrusted rabbit roulade!

Excellent! You've created your very first MallowBunny recipe! Now you can sit back and enjoy your delightful meal of Coconut Encrusted rabbit & Fluffy Bunny in preparation for easter.

Fig 6. Krus Enjoys his Fluffy Bunny.


Krus the bunny butcher said...

And yes, the bunny tastes just as good as it looks, like crap.

CJ said...

I'm telling the anti-vivesection league about you. And the animal rights activists. Bunny abusers...

Bozza said...

Yes because as we all know, marshmellow bunnies have feelings aswell, not just organic bunnies! So the fact you used a confectionery bunny and not an organic one, Still won't keep the PETA activists at bay.